
Family Guy — Season 3
Don't die laughing. We could get sued.
About this season
In this hilarious third season, the Griffin family faces all-new dilemmas, including Brian's unintentional foray into directing porn, Stewie's rants on national TV, Meg's date with a nudist and Lois' Yuletide insanity. Meanwhile, Peter is surprised to discover Lois was once a groupie, and his son, Chris, is more "endowed" than he is.
Episodes (22)

1. The Thin White Line (1)
7.4Aired 11 July 2001 • 23 min
Brian's keen sense of smell gets him a job with the police department.

2. Brian Does Hollywood (2)
7.2Aired 18 July 2001 • 23 min
Brian's first job in Hollywood is directing a pornographic film.

3. Mr. Griffin Goes to Washington
6.8Aired 25 July 2001 • 23 min
The tobacco industry sends Peter to Washington to present a speech about smoking.

4. One If by Clam, Two If by Sea
6.5Aired 1 August 2001 • 23 min
When a hurricane strikes Quohog, everything is destroyed including The Drunken Clam, which is bought out by a Brit who turns it into an English pub. As it happens, pub owner Nigel Pinchley and his family move in next door to the Griffins, and Stewie tries to teach Nigel's Cockney-accented 3-year-old daughter how to speak proper English.

5. And the Wiener Is...
7.1Aired 8 August 2001 • 23 min
Peter joins a gun club to compensate for his lack of physical assets; Meg becomes the target of the "cool" gang's wrath.

6. Death Lives
7.4Aired 15 August 2001 • 23 min
After a near-death experience on his anniversary, Peter learns the importance of spending time with Lois.

7. Lethal Weapons
7.0Aired 22 August 2001 • 23 min
New Yorkers invade the town in the fall; Lois hones her martial-arts skills.

8. The Kiss Seen Around the World
6.4Aired 29 August 2001 • 23 min
Meg lands an internship working with the school nerd at a television station.

9. Mr. Saturday Knight
6.9Aired 5 September 2001 • 23 min
Peter decides to pursue his dream career as a knight.

10. Fish Out of Water
6.4Aired 19 September 2001 • 23 min
When Peter decides to become a fisherman, he takes out a large loan to buy a fishing boat and unwittingly gives up everything he owns as collateral.

11. Emission Impossible
7.4Aired 8 October 2001 • 23 min
Lois' pregnant sister inspires her and Peter to have another baby.

12. To Love and Die in Dixie
7.3Aired 15 November 2001 • 23 min
The Griffins are put into the witness protection program.

13. Screwed the Pooch
6.8Aired 29 November 2001 • 23 min
Peter and Lois go to the Pewterschmidts for the weekend, bringing Brian along. Brian, meanwhile, has some "issues" of his own to work out. Find out if Brian's future is to make puppies or become "less" than he is.

14. Peter Griffin: Husband, Father... Brother?
7.0Aired 6 December 2001 • 23 min
While trying to teach Chris about his Irish roots, Peter stumbles upon Nate Griffin, a black man in his family tree. Peter tries to embrace his new-found heritage, but can’t quite get the hang of it. When Lois’ father, Carter Pewtershmidt, sits the Griffin kids down for a look at his family genealogy, a dark secret is uncovered.

15. Ready, Willing, and Disabled
7.0Aired 20 December 2001 • 23 min
Joe gets discouraged, losing his self-confidence, after he loses a thief in a chase. Peter wants to help Joe get back to his old self so he volunteers to help train him for the decathlon at the Olympics for handicapped athletes. Peter puts steroids into Joe's drink, pushing Joe on to victory. Meanwhile, Stewie, Meg, and Brian fight over $26.

16. A Very Special Family Guy Freakin' Christmas
6.5Aired 21 December 2001 • 23 min
Christmas comes to Quahog! While Lois attempt to make the holidays perfect for the Griffin family, Peter messes it up. Meanwhile, Stewie learns of Santa Claus’ ability to keep 24-hour surveillance on all the world’s children.

17. Brian Wallows and Peter's Swallows
7.0Aired 17 January 2002 • 23 min
Brian is sentenced to care for a crabby old woman; Peter's beard becomes a home for birds.

18. From Method to Madness
7.0Aired 24 January 2002 • 23 min
Stewie attempts a career in show business; Meg dates a nudist.

19. Stuck Together, Torn Apart
7.1Aired 31 January 2002 • 23 min
Peter's jealously forces a trial separation; Stewie and Brian get glued together.

20. Road to Europe
7.2Aired 7 February 2002 • 23 min
Stewie goes to England to take refuge in his favorite television show, while Lois embarrasses Peter at a KISS concert.

21. Family Guy Viewer Mail #1
7.1Aired 14 February 2002 • 23 min
Viewer mail inspires three stories in which Peter loses his bones, the Griffins gain superpowers, and Peter and his friends appear as eight-year-old "Little Rascals."

22. When You Wish Upon a Weinstein
6.7Aired 10 December 2004 • 23 min
The day that Peter buys volcano insurance is the day that Lois becomes fed up with their constant money problems.